Life Coaching
The Islam woman in the US I have known longer and we are coming together very soon. The Moroccan woman that I seek to marry as well will cause for a longer process to marry her and her parents have a particular way that they want their daughter to be married. The first woman in America. Has no parents and only her grandmother. This American raised woman has depended on me for 5 months now for financial and emotional support while finishing school. We have only maintained communication via calling, videoing and messaging each other. Our emotional and spiritual connection is very deep. However the Moroccan woman and I have a very very strong connection as well. We met on Muzz. She cannot come to the US essentially until I go there and we get married. My dilemma is I am in a position now where myself and the American raised woman are coming together physically this week and of course I want us to get married so that we can keep it halal and live together. If I marry her first though. I will not be eligible to marry the Moroccan woman because for the paperwork I’d fill out for our marriage. I would have to be single. I really am not sure what to do. I have been transparent and honest with both of them and they both agree that would not mind the three of us sharing the same roof and me marrying them both. They are completely fine. The problem resides in the fact that it is necessary for me to be legally single in order for me to marry the Moroccan woman. But also the American raised woman actually needs me right now and we must begin to live together to help us share finances and make it easier on me as the provider. So I cannot wait any longer with her. I hope this is clear. I am praying that you can help me. By the way. The Moroccan woman suggested you to me. Salam brother.
3
Answers
Life Coach
Hello, You need to make a decision matrix. What will happen if you marry the American woman? What won't happen if you marry the American woman? What will happen if you marry the Moroccan woman? What won't happen if you marry Moroccan woman? This will help you logically proceed with your decision. Warmly, Brett
Answered about 2 years ago
Chemist, Artist, Life expert
well I think you should do Nikah with the American one without the paperwork in a masjid then you can live together and then go and marry the Moroccan one and bring her to America !!
Answered over 1 year ago
Life Consultant and Smartphone guide.(7+ yrs exp.)
Wa alaikum assalam,
This is indeed a complex situation involving legal, emotional, and spiritual considerations. Here are some steps and considerations that may help you navigate this dilemma:
### 1. **Consult Legal Experts**
- **Immigration Lawyer**: Speak to an immigration lawyer to understand the legal requirements and implications of marrying the Moroccan woman after marrying the American-raised woman. There might be legal nuances and potential solutions that you are not aware of.
- **Family Law Attorney**: Consult a family law attorney to understand the implications of your marital decisions within the US legal framework, especially concerning polygamy and immigration.
### 2. **Religious Guidance**
- **Imam or Scholar**: Seek advice from an Imam or a knowledgeable scholar who understands both Islamic jurisprudence and the practical aspects of your situation. They can provide spiritual guidance and possible religious solutions that align with your faith.
### 3. **Consider Temporary Solutions**
- **Nikah without Legal Registration**: One option might be to perform a religious marriage (Nikah) with the American-raised woman without immediately registering it legally. This would allow you to live together in a halal manner and support each other financially. Once the marriage with the Moroccan woman is secured and her immigration process is initiated, you can then consider the legal registration of both marriages, if permissible.
- **Temporary Separation**: If feasible, consider the possibility of a temporary separation from the American-raised woman after the religious marriage to allow for the legal processes required to marry the Moroccan woman.
### 4. **Plan for Future Arrangements**
- **Long-Term Strategy**: Develop a long-term strategy that includes steps to fulfill your obligations towards both women while adhering to legal requirements. This might involve a phased approach where one marriage is prioritized for legal purposes, followed by the other.
### 5. **Open Communication**
- **Maintain Transparency**: Continue to be open and honest with both women about the challenges and possible solutions. Their understanding and cooperation are crucial in navigating this situation.
### 6. **Explore Alternative Solutions**
- **Visa Options**: Investigate alternative visa options that might allow the Moroccan woman to enter the US temporarily without immediate marriage. This could provide more flexibility in your plans.
- **Third-Country Meeting**: Consider the possibility of meeting the Moroccan woman in a third country where marriage laws might be more accommodating.
### 7. **Emotional and Financial Support**
- **Support Networks**: Ensure both women have access to additional support networks, such as family, friends, or community resources, to share the burden of emotional and financial challenges.
### 8. **Practical Considerations**
- **Living Arrangements**: Plan practical aspects like living arrangements, financial management, and roles within the household to ensure a harmonious life together.
### 9. **Continued Prayer and Reflection**
- **Istikhara**: Perform Salat al-Istikhara (prayer for guidance) to seek Allah's help in making the best decision.
- **Regular Prayer**: Continue making dua (supplication) and seeking Allah’s assistance and wisdom in handling this situation.
Navigating this situation requires careful consideration of all legal, religious, and personal factors. By taking a structured approach and seeking expert advice, you can make informed decisions that respect the needs and rights of everyone involved. May Allah guide you and make things easy for you.
Answered 5 months ago