Lesson: Decision Making & Happiness with Kevin Fishner

Step #7 Adapting: Try to avoid stressing about issues you have no control over

How will I be able to adapt to different lifestyle changes like getting married or having kids? One thing that I do to not worry about other decision making is I will block that from my brain. So I won't even think about marriage or children until that time comes. There's definitely a danger in not thinking that far into the future, but it makes me happier in the present day to avoid those decisions that, they're going to change. I know that I'm going to have a different opinion about marriage in the next year or the next years, so forming an opinion on it now, I don't think it's as worthwhile as focusing on what you're passionate about now and then letting those ideas come about naturally in the future.

That's a good question. It's scary. It's scary to have a regimented lifestyle and if something drastically changes, will I be able to adapt? I don't know the answer to that.

Compartmentalizing is an approach that I've learned from Buddhist monks where they remove all thoughts in their mind that aren't correlated to happiness. Very, very difficult. You should absolutely try it, but if any negative thought comes in your mind, it's cutting it off instantly and shedding it.

What this does is you think about things that make you happy and, of course, if you're thinking happy thoughts, you become happier. It's a great way to approach future decision making because, yes, kids will be important, but I don't need to think about it now and it's going to take away from my happiness in this present day, so I compartmentalize and push it off. I'm sure there are dangers of it. I don't want everybody to start doing that, but it works for me.