Sitemaps
Are We Growing or Just Getting Fat?
Let's Get Back to Our Why
Does Startup Success Validate Us Personally?
How We Secretly Lose Control of Our Startups
Should Kids Follow in Our Founder Footsteps?
The Evolution of Entry Level Workers
Assume Everyone Will Leave in Year One
Stop Listening to Investors
Was Mortgaging My Life Worth it?
What's My Startup Worth in an Acquisition?
When Our Ambition is Our Enemy
Are Startups in a "Silent Recession"?
The 5 Types of Startup Funding
What Is Startup Funding?
Do Founders Deserve Their Profit?
Michelle Glauser on Diversity and Inclusion
The Utter STUPIDITY of "Risking it All"
Committees Are Where Progress Goes to Die
More Money (Really Means) More Problems
Why Most Founders Don't Get Rich
Investors will be Obsolete
Why is a Founder so Hard to Replace?
We Can't Grow by Saying "No"
Do People Really Want Me to Succeed?
Is the Problem the Player or the Coach?
Will Investors Bail Me Out?
The Value of Actually Getting Paid
Why do Founders Suck at Asking for Help?
Wait a Minute before Giving Away Equity
You Only Think You Work Hard
SMALL is the New Big — Embracing Efficiency in the Age of AI
The 9 Best Growth Agencies for Startups
This is BOOTSTRAPPED — 3 Strategies to Build Your Startup Without Funding
Never Share Your Net Worth
A Steady Hand in the Middle of the Storm
Risk it All vs Steady Paycheck
How About a Startup that Just Makes Money?
How to Recruit a Rockstar Advisor
Why Having Zero Experience is a Huge Asset
My Competitor Got Funded — Am I Screwed?
The Hidden Treasure of Failed Startups
If It Makes Money, It Makes Sense
Why do VCs Keep Giving Failed Founders Money?
$10K Per Month isn't Just Revenue — It's Life Support
The Ridiculous Spectrum of Investor Feedback
Startup CEOs Aren't Really CEOs
Series A, B, C, D, and E Funding: How It Works
Best Pitch Decks Ever: The Most Successful Fundraising Pitches You Need to Know
When to Raise Funds
Why Aren't Investors Responding to Me?
Should I Regret Not Raising Capital?
Unemployment Cases — Why I LOOOOOVE To Win Them So Much.
How Much to Pay Yourself
Heat-Seeking Missile: WePay’s Journey to Product-Market Fit — Interview with Rich Aberman, Co-Founder of Wepay
The R&D technique for startups: Rip off & Duplicate
Why Some Startups Win.
Chapter #1: First Steps To Validate Your Business Idea
Product Users, Not Ideas, Will Determine Your Startup’s Fate
Drop Your Free Tier
Your Advisors Are Probably Wrong
Growth Isn't Always Good
How to Shut Down Gracefully
How Does My Startup Get Acquired?
Can Entrepreneurship Be Taught?
How to Pick the Wrong Co-Founder
Staying Small While Going Big
Investors are NOT on Our Side of the Table
Who am I Really Competing Against?
Why Can't Founders Replace Themselves?
Actually, We Have Plenty of Time
Quitting vs Letting Go
How Startups Actually Get Bought
What if I'm Building the Wrong Product?
Are Founders Driven by Fear or Greed?
Why I'm Either Working or Feeling Guilty
Startup Financial Assumptions
Why Every Kid Should be a Startup Founder
We Only Have to be Right Once
If a Startup Sinks, Founders Go Down With it
Founder Success: We Need a Strict Definition of Personal Success
Is Quiet Quitting a Problem at Startup Companies?
Founder Exits are Hard Work and Good Fortune, Not "Good Luck"
Finalizing Startup Projections
All Founders are Beloved In Good Times
Our Startup Culture of Entitlement
The Bullshit Case for Raising Capital
How do We Manage Our Founder Flaws?
What If my plan for retirement is "never retire"?
Startup Failure is just One Chapter in Founder Life
6 Similarities between Startup Founders and Pro Athletes
All Founders Make Bad Decisions — and That's OK
Startup Board Negotiations: How do I tell the board I need a new deal?
Founder Sacrifice — At What Point Have I Gone Too Far?
Youth Entrepreneurship: Can Middle Schoolers be Founders?
Living the Founder Legend Isn't so Fun
Why Do VC Funded Startups Love "Fake Growth?"
How Should I Share My Wealth with Family?
How Many Deaths Can a Startup Survive?
This is Probably Your Last Success
Why Do We Still Have Full-Time Employees?

Quitting vs Letting Go

Wil Schroter

Quitting vs Letting Go

How can we tell the difference between quitting and just "letting go" of our startup?

The outcome is the same, but how we feel about each path dramatically changes how we approach it. When we think about "quitting," we feel like a big loser. "Quitting is weak!" we may tell our alpha brains. We associate quitting with giving up, and that feels like a deeper, more humiliating version of failure.

Conversely, letting go feels kinda zen by comparison. It sounds like we've thoughtfully weighed our options and made a mature, worthy decision to move forward on a healthier path.

But are we just kidding ourselves because we're really giving up, or should we be proud of ourselves because we've made a sound decision?

Hello, Dr. Ego

Whenever I contemplate quitting versus letting go, I immediately consult "Dr. Ego," my personal therapist. She lives in my brain and only seems to want to get into these deep, emotional struggles when I'm laying awake at 3 a.m. staring at the ceiling, wondering what I just got myself into.

She explains to me that 90% of my decision-making when it comes to these things is never about facts; it's about emotion. It's about my personal perception of myself, which by definition, is completely fabricated. This tells me that if I "feel" like I'm giving up, then that's what I'm doing. But if I "feel" like I'm letting go, then that's also what I'm doing.

Apparently, my ego is the sole determining factor in this decision, which is total bullshit, because I'm completely awesome and my ego is awesome too (yes, and very sarcastic!) But she's right about one thing, I need to start the comparison with a realization that the difference either way is going to be my own perception of it.

So when is it "Quitting"?

There's no perfect answer, but generally quitting implies leaving early at startups. That actually wouldn't be so bad, except the notion is that we should have stayed, but we were too incapable of making it work. Let's call it what it sounds like — failure — whether it's really failure or not.

That failure brings with it many emotions, but guilt tends to be one that rises to the top for Founders because we often have other people attached to our outcome. Our employees, investors, customers, and even our friends and family all create some pressure around that failure.

What no one tells you at the time, so I'm going to tell you now, is that we rarely regret the things we quit. We often regret the things we should have quit long ago, and startups tend to consistently fall into this category. I've quit tons of things, even those that would have made me more money if I stayed, and to his day, I'm never like, "Oh man, I really wish I could have prolonged that misery so that I could have a nicer car!" To hell with that...

Time to Let it Go

The most productive path we can take is to "let it go," but unfortunately, that assumes we're cool with that decision. Many of us never feel validated because we're in a crappy situation to begin with, so the idea of "being cool about it" is the furthest thing from our mind.

That's because we're too focused on what we're leaving behind versus what we're gaining. We focus on losing the potential opportunity or sunk cost. Instead, we should be focused on not being miserable, being able to earn real money again, and being freed from something that's become a noose around our necks.

The difference between quitting and letting go is our realization that things that are bad for us should be put behind us. Are there cases where it takes some pain to build something great? Of course. But just because something is painful doesn't mean it's leading to somewhere great.

In Case You Missed It

Focus On What You Don’t Want To Do What happens when instead of worrying about the things we want to do, we focus on the things we never, ever want to do again? How can we start to take huge steps in reducing our overall stress?

That Founder Sold For Too Little! (podcast) A lot of Founders are stigmatized for selling their Startups for too little. The glaring truth is that non-Founders have never had that much money in their entire life! So their opinions aren’t valid.

Build Your Startup Around Your Passion Not every passion pays well. However, instead of starting with, "what will make the most money?" and hoping we like it, let’s start with what we’re most passionate about and figure out how to do that profitably.

Find this article helpful?

This is just a small sample! Register to unlock our in-depth courses, hundreds of video courses, and a library of playbooks and articles to grow your startup fast. Let us Let us show you!


OR


Submission confirms agreement to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy.

Already a member? Login

Chris C

Love this piece - it really hit the nail on the head for how I am feeling right now about leaving the startup I entered at it's earliest stage back in 2018. Thank you for writing it Wil

Replya year ago

Start a Membership to join the discussion.

Already a member? Login

Create Free Account